Book Signings have Changed!

How quiet can quiet be?

You may know there are new rules for book signings in Waterstones.  Basically, your slot is limited to two hours and authors must not ‘approach’ customers in the shop but wait politely, mute, like Victorian children, until they are spoken to first! In place for a few months now, book signings are, unsurprisingly, fewer than they have been in recent years.  It can be daunting for an author who is not famous, and it gives the impression that CEO James Daunt is really wanting only celebrity names that will attract queues of ‘fans’.

After more than 35 signings over the years, this was my first signing event under these regulations and it was so quiet I was preparing for an early bath.  I sat for a while in peaceful, reflective mood; after all, what else could I do? Contemplating the Mothers’ Day display, with its Baking Moulds and Janet and John fridge magnets, and the table with an assortment of Kindles, I was inwardly sighing at how things were not what they used to be. What lovely conversations I used to have!

Then I left my post in order to purchase a book upstairs (you’re curious perhaps; it was ‘Wedding Etiquette’ to assist me and my family in getting it right on my daughter’s special day). As I returned, there was a lady looking through my books. It was @CamObserved who had spotted me on Twitter! It turned out our children went to the same school and we had a mutual friend … This delightful person bought Shades of Appley Green and I decided to stay a little longer, still behaving immaculately – apart from my sign, which was a tad wicked I suppose.

'THIS AUTHOR DOES NOT BITE! - PLEASE APPROACH!!'

I ended up signing almost as many books as I might have done by chatting in the old way to likely and unlikely suspects alike. (If charity mugging is chugging, what is book mugging?) A lady came up to me very excited to see Gypsies Stop tHere and No Gypsies Served  –  her adult daughter always said she would like to try the Gypsy lifestyle for a while, so both books were bought for her daughter’s upcoming birthday. I had a lovely chat with a man who used to work with Travellers in Southwark and then a man from Aldershot considered my books thoughtfully and, after I had filled him in with a little background on each one, he bought all three.  It would have been unseemly to hug him and splash wet kisses upon his cheeks and, fortunately, I managed to stop myself in time.

All in all, I did not go home hoarse from talking for maybe four hours to customers who had come into the shop either with a precise purpose or to browse. I was surprised, but maybe this is the way to go after all!

I am not so daunted by Daunt as I was.

PS Big thank you to all in Camberley Waterstones!